Communication is an imperative form of interaction, and, as a matter of fact, the only means to get one’s message across.
Good communication skills are paramount to allow myself to be understood by others, while effective communication enables the prolonging of a conversation, and increases the likelihood of your audience warming up to you. Here, effective communication could possibly allow me to better bond with others; the choice of appropriate terms in a conversation impacts the way it will go, and this is part of effective communication. For example, the use of precise language in front of say, a hawker, may instead appear elitist, if not, different, somewhere ‘up there’. Of course, this applies beyond that. The point is, how you choose to communicate with others does determine, to some extent, whether they will become more willing to share their thoughts, or choose to erect an intangible barrier towards you. I'd pick the former, anytime.
Next, awareness of the know-hows of effective communication affects how you respond to others, and well, vice versa. During a job interview, one of the signs which suggest interest would be for either party to lean slightly forward. Understanding this, which I believe is part of effective communication, could indicate that: Yes Kristyn, they’re keen on what you’re saying, expand on the topic and wow them! On the other hand, the lack of such knowledge could inadvertently cause me to cease the conversation prematurely. In essence, effective communication does control the outcome of a situation. Thus, equipping myself with such skills would put me in a better position to leverage any situation. As Robert Anton Wilson puts it aptly, “A monopoly on the means of communication may define a ruling elite more precisely than the celebrated Marxian formula of monopoly in the means of production.”
11 comments:
Hi Kristyn,
I like that the main points in your post are in bold. This makes it really easy to identify your points. Good job on the idea!
I can relate to your example on the choice of appropriate terms (or language for that matter) in a conversation. Just last week, I was ordering food from Riverside Indonesian BBQ (at Plaza Singapura) and the person at the stall was stunned when I spoke to her in proper English. I think she was expecting me to speak mandarin since I’m a Chinese. (Usually I’ll speak mandarin but somehow I didn’t). However, I think a hawker might not be a very strong occupation to illustrate that point. Perhaps an example like a taxi driver would be more appropriate since there might be more interaction?
As for your example on the job interview, have you personally experienced it? Sometimes I’m curious what are interviewers thinking when they adopt a certain posture. Anyway, as much as leaning forward could be a sign of interest, it might not mean anything too. As such, we have to be discerning when we try to interpret body languages.
All in all, it was a pleasure to read your post (:
Hi Kristyn, on a sidenote I wanted to tell you that the spelling of your name is extremely unique LOL. Now coming back to your post, I find that your post is an interesting read. I agree with you that communication must be adjusted according to the environment. I was imagining speaking to a hawker in bombastic words and speaking to our boss in Singlish. It would be hilarious to gather the reactions of both the hawker and your boss.
I feel that job interviews also depend on the situation and the mood of the interviewer. Some of the interviewer may like the interviewee to be formal while others like our dear Brad may prefer the other person to be informal. So I feel that effective communication must not only deliver a message properly but must also be able to read what the sender is expecting from the receiver so that the communication thread between both the entities would be healthy.
I enjoyed reading your post. Thank you Kristyn:)
Hey doll. First off, I agree with Joel that the highlights do help. They let me recap the different main points as I go through the passage especially late at night when I'm half asleep lol.
Anyway, what i found most interesting about your post is the line'effective communication controls the outcome of the situation'(surprise surprise, it's in bold). As we're starting to learn, there are a lot of subtle things to take note of to ensure effective communication.
It's just intriguing to imagine how all those little things can make a world of a difference in one's first impression of you which in turn affects the relationship he/she pursues with you which in turn affects, well, our lives. I just find it quite cosmic in that sense. Quite a nice thought and also very true.
Bringing it back to school context, I think an excellent example would be first day of a school with a new teacher. The way the teacher communicates sends you vibes about to what extent you want to cooperate with her in class, her confidence in her craft (which indicates her teaching capability to some extent), whether you're going to enjoy the subject for the rest of the semester, or even if you can get away with not doing your homework.
woah long comment.
@Joel: Lol, I interact more with hawkers. I find it much easier to relate to them. Haha, anyhow, that example just came up so yup. Maybe I'll use an example that most could relate to the next time (: Thanks though!& Yeah, you're right in saying how we need to be discerning when we interpret non-verbal cues. I think, this depends on the situation as well, and a certain message needs more than just 1 or 2 cues to verify so yup. Thanks!
@Loshini:
Yes you're very right in saying that a message needs verification from both parties so as not to make uncredited assumptions which might ruin the convo or something. Joel has put it aptly through the need to be discerning of comm. cues(: Thanks Loshini!
@Ariele:
Yes long comment Ariele! Haha, it's not easy to just pick out examples. I was having a really tough time deciding on what context to bring in but ya, kinda gave up at 3am so yeah. Haha, see you tmr!
oh and i wanted to say i agree with you on the hawker thing. like when i order laksa i say 'no cockles' and they start going mcq on me like 'no daogei is it?''no chilli is it?' so i just stick to 'laksa mai hum' or however you spell it and it gets the point across perfectly with much less effort.
Hi, Kristyn!
Thank you for making this point- "effective communication enables the prolonging of a conversation, and increases the likelihood of your audience warming up to you." It is indeed a valid point, in my opinion. It has never occur to me that this is something effective communication can do, and now that you've pointed it out, it has been replaying in my head since.
Yup, it is true that how you choose to communicate would determine the willingness of the other party to share. I will choose not to continue my conversation with one should he/she appears nonchalant. I believe that in order for communication to occur, sensitivity is the key. We've to be sensitive not only to the person's character/personality, but also their responses.
Thank you, Kristyn, for this post. The points that you've raised is impactful.
Thanks, Kristyn, for this clear, concise post. You make a convincing statement of the general importance of comm skills. You elaborate more specifically then on how such skills can enable/empower you.
There is only only one statement in your post that I wonder about: "...while effective communication enables the prolonging of a conversation...."
That is indeed true. However, for me that appears to be focusing on one isolated, seemingly random part of the process. One can only prolong what one has already initiated. One can only prolong what one has determined to be of interest and received feedback on.
Do you see what I mean?
In any case, this is a good effort, one that has elicited lots of comments from classmates.
@ Ariele
Wow, these people can get relentless. & soo cynical.
@ Gladys
Thanks dear!
@ Brad
Yes, I think I get what you mean. The communication process deals with more than just extending the conversation, yup!
Hello Kristyn,
Before I comment on anything else, being a glutton I was more interested in your baking post. Great job! Keep it up, you're making me hungry at 10.25pm!
I agree with you that communication skills is extremely important and it's vital to know what to say and how to say the same message to different group of people. Its the key to being sensitive and it prevents you from being labelled without you having any ill intentions.
As for an interview, I'm not too sure about leaning forward but I'm pretty sure smiling and looking confident help. Plus, I get a morale boost when my interviewers laugh along with me when I attempt to joke. :)
And thanks for such a clear post with your main points in bold. Helped a lot with the reading! (Especially with all the tabs distracting me :P)
Dear Jacq,
Thanks for your comment! Yeah, I think I'll work harder on my examples for the next few posts, if there may be any examples to include. Haha, cheers!
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